The importance of you Published Oct. 26, 2010 By Col. Stephen Whiting 21st Space Wing commander PETERSON AIR FORCE BASE, Colo. -- Every morning when I come to work, I have a routine. A member from our front office staff has already opened the office, fired up the computers, and started the coffee--so I grab a cup, trade paperwork with my exec, log onto my computers, and review the overnight reports. These reports provide situational awareness on what's happening on our base, in our wing, in Joint space operations, and across our Air Force. While they each contain vital information, the first report I open is a summary of major Air Force operations and incidents over the last 24 hours. Unfortunately, what has led me to prioritize this report as my first read of the morning is not the information it provides on Air Force support to global operations. Rather, it's the information in the report regarding Air Force deaths, and in particular, Air Force suicides. Just this morning (as I write this article), the death of a 19-year-old Airman from of an apparent suicide at an overseas base was reported. Other than providing his career field and squadron, no other facts were known at the time of the report. While I didn't know this Airman or his situation, I do know that his family, his friends, and his fellow Airmen are missing him terribly right now. In no uncertain terms, his death is an unspeakable tragedy for all who knew him and for our Air Force. And, unfortunately, our Air Force has had too many of these types of events over the last year. As I read the report of the Airman's death this morning, I had two thoughts. First, people are still struggling with the multitude or magnitude of problems in their lives and, in some desperate cases, have turned to a self-destructive solution. Second, is the importance of you. By you, I mean you as Airmen, supervisors, neighbors, friends, and, yes, Wingmen. Lives have been saved and issues that were thought to be unsolvable have been resolved because of you, and we continue to rely on you to be there for each other. The stories we hear of suicides happening in the Air Force are striking. Unfortunately, because of their very personal nature, the details are often concealed from most Airmen. As we've seen time and again, however, it's the details that make the story real, that change the individual report of a suicide from being an impersonal statistic to being a personal story of a fellow Airman. The details tell the story that other Airmen can relate to. They may also be clues to a puzzle. When we investigate suicides and other serious incidents, the details inevitably form a pattern that, when presented as a whole, paint a very clear picture that an Airman was in trouble. Most of us are only privy to one or two of these clues, and we have to be alert to them. And we have to be ready. The onus is on all of us, because we are all in a position to help. When a crime is being committed in your neighborhood, maybe you hear a car or house siren going off. Maybe, heaven forbid, a weapons discharge or shouting. These signals are obvious. The only audible clue might be the faint sound of glass breaking, making you think your neighbor was clumsy doing the dishes. Or perhaps there is the slightest echo of a strange noise that makes you hesitate. There are rarely no signals at all, however. It is much more likely the visible signs are not perceived. Similarly, the signs for a suicide can be loud and clear, or just as muted. That's why it is so vital we maintain vigilant watch over each other. Commander's involvement and support is important to elevating this awareness. Wingman days, suicide briefings and the like are our attempts to communicate to you that we care and want to help. And we need you - I need you - to stay on the look-out. Keep your eyes open for those signals - faint as they may be. Be willing to get involved and sound the alarm. Maybe it will be nothing. That's fine. But if there is something wrong, you might be the only one that hears the warning. If you've done your Human Relations training lately, you will have read that those who are least willing to share their problems can be the ones most at risk. Remember that just because someone doesn't talk about their problems doesn't mean they don't have them. Think about all the things you deal with... work, finances, family and marital issues, sometimes all piling on top of each other. Now imagine you have no one to talk to... How overwhelming that must be. This may be what someone is feeling if they are isolated from others. How much harder is it to take on everything alone? Being able to talk to someone - even if it's because they insisted on it - could make the all the difference. We see over and over that the problems people are facing are NOT insurmountable - they only feel that way to the person. Another person can offer perspective and help. We have a fairly recent example of this within our medical group. He's allowed me to share his story as an example of how a good Wingman can make the difference. At the beginning of the year, this brand new Airman reported to his first ever duty assignment at Peterson AFB. He attended the First Term Airman Course, where he met his Wingman, and settled into his new job. Shortly after, tragedy occurred for this Airman. His grandfather, who'd had a hand in raising him, passed away on a holiday. Most unfortunately, his death was by suicide, which caused a great deal of turmoil for the Airman and his family. After a few weeks, from the perspective of his coworkers, things settled out. After a few months, the Airman had a couple of problems at work, but nothing that anyone worried about, even though the behavior was out of the norm. Before long, however, the Airman was overwhelmed, not knowing what to do, but feeling like things were hopeless. Fortunately, he did the right thing for himself and sent a text to the friend he'd met at FTAC. Even better, his Wingman responded. Once the Wingman realized what was going on, he encouraged our Airman to talk to his first sergeant, sticking by his friend every step of the way. We don't know what would have happened had the Wingman disregarded the signal. Thankfully, we don't have to know. Our wing is doing a tremendous job of executing our missions. We're also doing a good job of taking care of each other. Please keep it up. Be alert to the shadow in someone's eye or the slightly odd behavior and engage it. Everyone needs a Wingman at some point. Paraphrasing one of our superb Airmen, you don't have to be a hero, just recognize that you might be in the right place at the right time to prevent a fellow Airman from making an irreversible decision that leads to great tragedy.